How I Work
Human Behaviour & Relationships Coaching
Sometimes the problem is obvious. You keep having the same argument. You are doing far more than your share. A workplace or family dynamic is draining you.
Other times, the problem is harder to name. You keep second-guessing yourself, overthinking, pushing harder, losing confidence, or ending up in the same kind of situation even when the people or circumstances change. You know something isn’t working, but you can’t quite see why.
That is where our work begins.
Together, we will look beneath the surface and make sense of what is happening in you, what may be happening around you, and the patterns that keep getting created, whether they involve another person, situation, or the way you are responding to it.
The goal is not to assume that every difficult relationship, situation, or pattern must be fixed or ended. It is to help you see what is happening clearly enough to make choices grounded in reality rather than guilt, fear, habit, hope, or the belief that if you just try a little harder, everything will somehow sort itself out.
Who This Is For
This coaching is for emotionally well adults who are functioning in their lives but feel stuck, confused, or drained by a pattern involving themselves or another person.
The relationship may be with a partner, family member, friend, colleague, group, organization, or with yourself.
This may be a good fit if:
- You keep finding yourself in the same kind of dynamic with different people.
- You are tired of doing all the emotional work.
- You understand a lot about yourself but still struggle to respond differently.
- You have difficulty setting limits without feeling guilty.
- You are unsure whether the problem is yours, theirs, or what happens between you.
- You want to stop overexplaining, overgiving, overfunctioning, or hoping someone else will change.
- You want to understand why a situation affects you so strongly.
- You need help deciding what can change, what may need to be accepted, and what is no longer sustainable.
You do not need another label. You need a clearer understanding of what is actually happening.
How We Work
Our work is collaborative, practical, and curious. We will not simply talk about what isn’t working; we’ll look at what is happening underneath it, what keeps it in place, and what becomes possible when you understand it more clearly.
I draw from a range of therapeutic coaching tools to help you untangle thoughts, feelings, fears, expectations, and needs; calm the nervous system when a situation feels emotionally charged; work through difficult emotions; strengthen self-trust; and create responses that feel more deliberate and less automatic.
1. Understand Yourself
We begin with what is happening in you. Together, we may explore your reactions, emotional triggers, beliefs, expectations, protective habits, unmet needs, and the roles you tend to take on in relationships.
Some patterns are easy to see but much harder to change. You may understand perfectly well that you are people-pleasing, avoiding conflict, overgiving, trying to earn approval, or taking responsibility for everyone else—and still feel unable to stop.
This is where the coaching becomes more than conversation. We can work with the emotional charge and nervous-system responses that keep the pattern in place, strengthen your sense of self, and help you practise a different way of responding.
2. Understand the Other Person
We look realistically at the person you are dealing with. What do their choices and behaviour consistently show you? What are they capable of offering? Are they willing to participate, communicate, repair, or adapt—or are you doing most of the relational work?
The aim is not to diagnose them, excuse their behaviour, or conduct a six-session forensic investigation of someone who is not in the room. It is to see them clearly enough that you are no longer making decisions based only on hope, guilt, potential, or wishful thinking.
3. Understand What Happens Between You
Every relationship creates a pattern. One person may pursue while the other withdraws. One overfunctions while the other does less. One avoids discomfort while the other keeps explaining. Both people may become caught in reactions that reinforce each other.
We will identify the pattern and explore what changes when you stop automatically playing your usual part.
4. Decide What Comes Next
Once you understand the situation more clearly, we look at what is realistically possible.
That might mean communicating differently, trying a new response, setting a boundary, changing your expectations, accepting the limits of the relationship, reducing contact, reshaping the connection, or moving on.
There is no predetermined answer. The purpose of the work is to help you reach your own with greater clarity, self-trust, and a realistic understanding of what the relationship can—and cannot—be.
What You May Gain
- A clearer understanding of the pattern you are caught in
- Greater awareness of your own triggers, needs, and responses
- A more realistic view of the other person and what they are capable of
- Less guilt about setting limits
- More confidence in communicating what you need
- Greater self-trust and more confidence in your own judgement and decisions
- Practical ways to calm emotional reactivity and respond differently
- A clearer sense of what can change and what may need to be accepted
- A decision you can trust about what comes next
Widen the Frame
Stuck in a difficult situation or relationship?
Widen the Frame is a short thinking tool to help you step back, look beyond the obvious, and make sense of what’s really going on before deciding what to do next.
The Coaching Package
Six Private Coaching Sessions
Six- 60-minute private coaching sessions focused on one significant pattern or issue that keeps affecting your life, work or relationships.
Via Zoom, either weekly or bi-weekly.
Investment: $1,200
Before we begin, we will have a brief conversation to make sure the issue is appropriate for coaching and that the fit feels right.
Client Reflection
“Sherry is a great listener and incredibly attuned to my energy—even virtually, she can read me through the screen. She has a strong ability to frame the situations I describe in a way that leads to an ‘aha’ moment, where everything suddenly makes sense. Our work has helped me quiet my inner critic, trust myself more, and remember my competence and capabilities—especially when I struggle to remember them myself.”
A Note About Scope
This work is designed for emotionally well adults whose needs are appropriate for coaching. It is not therapy and is not intended to assess, diagnose, or treat mental-health conditions.
Ready to Begin?
You may come because of someone else. But our work begins with what is happening in you—and what becomes possible when you understand the pattern clearly enough to choose differently.
Together, we will decode the invisible patterns shaping your relationships—with yourself and others—so you can decide what to change, what to accept, where to set limits, and when to walk away.